Well the Hyphen says that one day I will find the perfect graduate school. Perhaps the Hyphen is correct and things will get better. I can tell you this much I picked up my car for the automotive repair specialist, and then the radiator blew up for a second day in a row. Who knew that car repair was such a difficult business?
I have made some decisions about the future of my life. They go something like this I will be taking the LSAT in October. When I was a little kid, all I wanted to do was be a corporate lawyer. To be more specific a contract lawyer, that is the direction that I was headed before my junior year of college. I changed the direction of my life toward public service, and the study of public administration.
Now is the time to go back to the basics to take this chance to do something that I really want to do, before it becomes time to do what has to be done. I do want to be a professor someday. I would like to teach public administration, study the future of technology in government, and spend my entire lifetime learning. That said, I do not really know what I am going to do with the next year.
What I do know is that Hyphen likes California. I might end up going out to Washington, D.C. to work on some software. I might end up going slightly west coast for a Denver Omelet. All I know is that one day it will all make sense, until then that day comes I secretly hope that my car stops exploding.
Some people go an entire lifetime without experiencing a truly defining moment. Today I finally got word from the last PhD school that I sent an application. The word was not good. It appears that I am not an acceptable candidate for graduate school at this time. Today is a new day, a day of hope, a day of promise for the future. Well maybe today is a just a day, but probably it is a day at a crossroads.
Now is the time to make a decision. Where will I be going in life? What should I spend my life doing? How did I go manage to fail at applying to PhD schools? Will I ever figure out what I am supposed to be doing? These are all questions and for the most part, they are the wrong questions
Work has been getting harder and harder over the last couple of days. Sometimes my friends give me trouble about working to hard. Well it is true that I do not have a job. It is also true that sometimes, not having a job is, is the key to starting your own job. I have been working very hard over the last couple of months to put together a new program.
Circa 1998, I wanted to start a company and things went fairly well, but did not turn out the way I wanted. Then around the year 2000, SNRP went fairly well and was within a stones through of being a success. At least that is the way I remember things, I try not to remember being snubbed for venture capital or other various failures.
This time, this year, is going to be different. I am working directly in my own best interest without any real pressure. Sure, I feel the pressure of time and of the future, but sometimes that is just enough motivation to keep things going. That is what I need at this point in my life a giant cup of motivation. Well maybe I will go get a cup of coffee that is the best I can do right now.
Played softball yesterday, it was a very interesting experience; I learned that I really do not have very much coordination. I fell down while I was batting, running to second base, and even sliding into third base. Of course, I did not fall down once while playing first base. Everyday of the last couple of months, I have been getting more and more upset about listening to shallow politics.
Even the rock the vote campaign has become a false prophet spreading a message of hate. I went to Van
Last night was a crazy evening in Lawrence, Kansas. We ended up going to Jack Flannigan
I woke up this morning to the sounds of people moving things. For some reason the family was trying to bribe me with bacon, egg, and cheese biscuits to move some tables. Who knows why people like to work in the morning. Last night I fell asleep watching the Sopranos. Today I am supposed to go to the country club pool. That will be a nice place to relax for a little bit and enjoy the day.
Sometimes I feel like I have been wasting the days and not getting enough accomplished. Jaccie wonders why I do not write as much as I probably should. It is not from having a lack of something to say. I want to finish the computer program I have been working on before I spend to much time writing. One of the problems with that type of work is that it requires investing yourself very heavily into a project. I feel like for hours at time being so involved in something that everything else in the world seems to pass into the sands of time. Of course, I know what it takes to be a successful programmer.
Being able to take the time to do something, the right way is difficult. Being consumed by a project is not always the best way to deal with things in life. However sometimes to be able to accomplish something great you have to take a step back and build for the future. I know that every moment I spend working on this project is time invested in myself. Thinking about starting a company is no joke, being absolutely dependent on your own ability, moving forward without a fall back position.
I am really glad that this weblog issue has been resolved today. Who knows maybe this will even work out without to much blood shed on the internet search engine rankings? Who knows what will end up happening in the next couple of months, but I know that it is going to be an interesting period of my life.
The last couple of days have been rather intense. I swear that my life changes at a very slow pace. I must admit that I was tricked by GJOE tonight. I was drinking the usual gin and tonic perhaps a double or maybe even a triple, when all of a sudden when my attention was lapsing GJOE swapped my glass of gin for a glass of pure tonic. No real friend would ever participate in such a sinister trick. Andy thought it was one of the funnier moments of the evening. On a personal note, I really do not like tonic water; in fact, I have a rather strong disdain for the substance.
Sometimes you have to spend some time with your friends to put things in perspective. Jaccie and Andy went to the trouble of taking me out on the town. We went to Old Chicago to have a few drinks and enjoy the evening. Today was supposed to be the day that I would find out the answer to one of the potential future paths of my life. Who knew that silence would be so deafening. I am really not that lazy I promise. One day I will get a job, and do something productive. However, today is not that day! This summer of freedom is almost over. I have been all over the globe, from the Peoples Republic of China to Cancun, Mexico.
I have never really had anything against hackers, but these days it seems that people are getting restless on the internet. Who knows? Maybe Nels Lindahl Dot Com has become a major interest to the digital elite. Well comment spammers beware! I have now implemented a system that requires comment approval. Maybe that will solve the problems that I was having, while resolves the problems I am having. In any event, the webpage is backup and running. I will make some changes in the next couple of days to make sure that all of the content is available. Of course, it will be another couple of weeks before all of the writing is back online. I hope that with some database revisions I will be able to get some of the novels fixed. Oh yeah, I am now back from Mexico.
Some days are better than others, without question, every once in awhile a day stumbles by that is changes things. My outlook on life is simple, I have no fear of life and at the same time I have no fear of death. For some people this is a difficult mantra to uphold. One of the things that I want to accomplish over the next couple of months is putting down some of my policy statements to paper. Who knows maybe one or two of them might end explaining the future.
It is strange to say this, but I really miss the University of Kansas Public Administration class of 2005. Normally I do not really get attached to people very easily. Somehow, the class was endearing in a very eclectic way. I have been around such a diverse set of individuals who were all motivated by study, but for different reasons. It is easy for a stranger to figure out that I have a love for education for the sake of education.
One of the problems with my never-ending desire for education is that over the years, I seem to dissent more and more. When you think of the voice of dissent in modern America it is easy to list off authors like Chomsky. For some reason the country seems to be moving away from my visions of a functional utopia. Who knows what is really going on in the world these days? Well just a couple days until I leave for Mexico? I think I am going to go swim suit shopping tomorrow.
My humblest apologizes worthy reader, if you have been checking this page, and not found anything new to read. This last year has gone by so fast. From starting a second college degree in the midst of a very serious relationship to learning that, I could graduate in only one year. Well I now have two degrees and I left so much behind to sacrifice for my education. I did not spend enough time with all of my friends, and alas, I had several failed relationships during the last year. It happens I know that. I am not worried about the future.
This was actually the month, where I was going to give up my pursuits of higher education, and spend all of my time working on a computer program. However, things change, just as they always do, and for some reason probably always will. I have been enjoying my summer with reckless abandon. From spending my mornings at the country club, sipping beverages and getting slightly tan. I made some poolside phone calls, to Andy ?Blue? O?MacPhelan, during the course of my very busy day.
Of course, I have to take time out to note that Gus has returned from Australia. Gus went to Australia with a small amount of love for the Kangaroo a creature that is observed with a certain degree of reverence throughout the world. When Gus returned from Australia, Kangaroos were no longer acceptable; they became a pesky rodent like creature, that simply does not belong. Who do those Australians think they are? Besmirching the good name of the Kangaroo? This newfound hatred of such a loveable creature causes me to be able to seriously question what they have been drinking down under.